Thursday, 20 October 2016

2.45am to 4.08am and counting

I've been standing in the dark rocking for over an hour now. If I even so much as think about relaxing an eyelash, the little one starts screaming. Suspect tomorrow will be another caffeine day. On the plus side, I'm strengthening my thighs, I get to feel the delightful luxury of my thick rug under my bare feet and I remember to appreciate the comfort and warmth of my bed. I also get to drink yet more Covent Garden Tea House Heavenly Tea.

Wednesday, 28 September 2016

Peppa pig creators should do my bathtime

Screaming threenager at bath time because "I don't like how the water is looking at me." And apparently Grandpa Pig said that about a bush. Peppa bloody pig, you have a lot to answer for!

Monday, 26 September 2016

Three today

Our baby boy is three; no longer a baby, but a bright spark of a child who sees and thinks about everything. It's been wonderful to watch him grow - hard at times to bring up a wilful, determined, assertive child, with very strong opinions and feelings, but I'm so glad he came to us. He brings laughter and love to my heart every single day. Happy birthday little man, may this year bring you greater understanding of the ways things work, to lessen your frustrations and decrease your fears; and may I continue to improve as your guide in an often confusing world. Love you always.

Saturday, 24 September 2016

Celebration of life - a toddler birthday

I keep crying this morning, full of emotion and gratitude, enhanced possibly by barely any sleep and the advent of my baby's third tooth.

Baking birthday cake for the toddler's third birthday, and listening to Hafdis Huld. Younger longer is making me think of my beautiful little family, my extended family and friends, and creating such powerful ebbs of overwhelming gratitude and happiness. I feel so lucky this morning, happy in the company of the man, the kids, my sister and her man.

Younger longer, Hafdis Huld

Thursday, 22 September 2016

Today's excellent happenings

I'm going to be very boring with teething, but it really helps me get through the hell of it if I celebrate the countdown to 20. So, baby girl has a second tooth. Woohoo! Only 18 more to go. I am truly happy. There are two more on the very verge of emerging, perfectly placed to cause agony on the third birthday weekend of my toddler.

The baby girl, 7 months and 4 days, STOOD ON HER OWN today. She promptly fell over, but she did it. She's also been spending ages trying to work out how to climb steps. I am less pleased about this as I can see it will end in tears at some point, but I'm hugely impressed with the standing.

None of us slept last night (baby girl teething and toddler boy being starving ravenous at 1.30am, necessitating a bowl of cereal with toddler whispering (aka shouting) accompanying the meal). After a cup of very nice caffeinated tea (Covent Garden Tea House heavenly tea) my day was surprisingly enjoyable. Our rugby was cancelled, but we didn't get the message, so the two coaches played with the toddler for 45 minutes instead. He adores them and had a whale of a time. Baby girl happily sat in dirt and ate tofu and black olives. I happily sat on a step in the sunshine, getting covered in half chewed tofu and black olives.

We perused the (toy) contents of four charity shops. Satisfaction all round.

Man was home for dinner which made for peaceful and enjoyable dinner.

So the day ended with sleeping baby puking on my bed, but the sheets needed changing anyway, so I have a nice clean bed to look forward to. And she fell asleep again quickly.

All in all, a great day. Small blessings make for happiness and contentment.

Monday, 12 September 2016

Exercise and motherhood - the reality

Inspired by comments such as "everyone has time to exercise."

I used to exercise regularly. Pre kids. When I had my son, yoga, running and swimming stopped - because of the loose ligaments due to breastfeeding, post c-section recovery and back pain from carrying a Velcro baby around all the time. Then I started physio with my son crawling all over me. As he got bigger (big enough for a bike) I rode with him. I started yoga again on weekend mornings after he'd nursed.

He got too big for mother and baby yoga, he hated buggy fit, he hated some great classes I found with babysitters, so my choices were very limited.

Now I have two kids. I feel ready to exercise again. I'm home alone for 10-11 hours with them (with literally often no breaks), but she's not big enough for a bike, I try to do yoga or my 7-min work out app, but try doing a plank with a toddler on your back and a baby crawling under you - I'm not complaining, I'm serious. Try it! My exercise comes as squats and lunges to pick stuff off the floor with a sleeping baby in a sling; or carrying both when the big one is too tired to keep walking; or pushing a buggy with a big kid and his bike on it, while carrying the little kid. Everything a mama does, in my world, feels like exercise, but I still miss what I used to do.

So, to cut a long story short, I decided to go to the park for a quick session of short sprints, lunges, squats and step ups. (Imagined reality - half an hour, tops).

I had to take my daughter (breastfeeding), which meant I had to take my husband (to hold daughter while I sprinted as she won't be left in a buggy (teething, poorly and dislike of constraints)), so we decided to tag with the baby, take turns at sprinting. This meant we also had to take the toddler - couldn't leave him home alone. He didn't like being left behind when one of us sprinted, so we got to do a little sprint, then running while holding a toddler who insisted on wearing wellies that were too big, so repeated squats to pick them up as they fell off along the way. Then he remembered the playground and ran away. One adult had to follow, which meant the other couldn't sprint, so we had a family trip to the playground. Three hours later we finally went home, one pushing a buggy with a sleeping baby, the other carrying the now very tired toddler on his shoulders. (Actual reality - three and a half hours).

This is why mamas often say they don't have time to exercise. :-)

Thursday, 11 August 2016

Life and death in toddler world

Toddler found a dead bumble bee. He said very excitedly "I have a new pet. I have a pet bumble bee. I love my pet." My heart melted and I felt a tiny bit bad he doesn't have a real pet. Not bad enough to get one. He loves bugs. He had a 'pet' ladybird too until it disintegrated and then he was utterly bereft on and off for almost two days. Cannot imagine the level of bereft if a real pet died.

Tuesday, 2 August 2016

What happens if you screw with a toddler's routine

As if today wasn't tough enough (a very overtired toddler and a puking infant, I blame teething for the latter), the doctor's only appointment (for the toddler's infected BCG scar) was at toddler teatime, so we had an early tea.

Started fine, then the pharmacy didn't have his prescription because it's apparently out of stock. This meant going back to the doctors, where my lovable (and very overtired) toddler ran around the waiting room, arms flailing and ripping off all the important laminated posters, and constantly threatening to run out of the wide open (and non closable) doors into the road.

I then had to take this toddler to another pharmacy (in Waitrose, the only place with the medicine in stock), where he proceeded to relieve the shelves of their contents.

All this took so long that it was now into bath time and already overtired toddler was at mega tired levels. On top of this, infant missed her teatime nap and was starting to get rather irate (and hungry). Thankfully she was in the sling so I could feed and walk and comfort all at once. Cue to toddler to run as fast as he could from me, arms flailing, aiming for the automatic doors into the busy carpark. Cue me running as fast as my flip flopped feet could carry me, while trying to stop infant bobbing out of sling or tearing off my nipple.

Finally managed to get toddler's hand in an iron grip, when infant decided the outside world was far too interesting to feed any more. Smiled sweetly (and very cutely) up at me, thus revealing a boob I was not able to put away until toddler was safely in the car.

I managed all this with only one shout (necessary to get the attention of toddler across the other side of Waitrose), but it took all my energy to not bawl my eyes out driving home. A crash due to inability to see would have been just too much after the day I've had.

I love my children dearly, but tonight is one of those nights where absolute bliss = sitting on the sofa in my PJs, all alone, surrounded by toys I can't be bothered tidying away.

Friday, 22 July 2016

First world problems

Screaming baby (teething...?), poorly son with fever who just wants hugs, and the 8th day of no washing machine, so I'm resorting to washing very stinky nappies from pre washing machine breakdown by hand, while feeding a baby to sleep in the sling and hoping desperately son doesn't run in screaming just as she falls asleep (happened twice today already). At least the dishwasher now works. At least it's sunny. At least I have a roof over my head and food to eat. At least I have clean running water.

#firstworldproblems #50sHousewife #oneofthosedays

Saturday, 16 July 2016

The moments after waking

Well that was a better night. By far. My little (almost) 5 month old pumpkin actually slept. Back to normal, I am hoping.

She woke at 5am and played happily with the sheet for a bit, kicking her little legs and gurgling. I pretended to be asleep for a little longer, squinting at her through half closed eyes. Then I could see her staring at me and she lay still. As soon as I opened my eyes, she smiled and started kicking her legs again. My heart melted.

My son used to do the same thing. How quickly he has grown, almost 3 years now. He woke from his nap yesterday, confused, saying he wanted to go downstairs to daddy. I smiled and said "it's not morning, you've just woken from your nap". He laughed. Looked sheepish. I told him that tomorrow was Saturday and daddy would be home then. "Oooh, the weekend," he squealed, "We can go to a dinosaur museum and look at dinosaur bones!" Not this weekend, but I promised soon. I told him this was something we could do one day a good few weeks ago. And he remembered. He started telling me about the dinosaur round the corner that roared. I think it was a dream.

I love the moments just after waking the best, with my beautiful, sweet, quickly growing babies.