Sunday 28 February 2010

Geckos and physics

I'm on the 25th floor and there is a gecko in the food cupboard. How lucky am I? At least I know now that they speak, otherwise I'd have been somewhat confused (and probably a bit scared) later on, if he does in fact decide to chat to me.

I'd kind of thought that animals couldn't climb this high and decided that spiders certainly couldn't possibly climb this high. But then I decided spiders couldn't get to floating cottages in the middle of lakes and it seems that they can.

I've done a good few hours of writing today, some eating of chocolate and I've confirmed my first Tai Chi class for Tuesday evening. Hurrah. Currently watching something on Ted and it's really good and very funny. Recommended by me: beauty and truth in physics. I hope you enjoy it too.

Saturday 27 February 2010

Fairy lights

Fairy lights never fail to make a home feel like a home. Them and plants.

I have managed to achieve the following today:
  • Clothes washing (two loads) - very important
  • Food shopping - lots of vegetables (including some odd mushrooms the same as I ate on my last night in Reading and something I think is an aubergine), noodles and fruit
  • Fairy lights (through visitation of friends and a temporary loan)
  • Identification of suitable Tai Chi classes and emailing of relevant person to inform them of my attendance next week
  • Finding of a Catholic Church - so that my Mama knows I am safe (handily around the corner, so didn't take too much effort)
  • Ascertaining that there is a good running route nearby - just need to run it now
  • Watering plants and removing dead bits
  • Tried to have a conversation with the old lady in the lift - neither of us spoke each other's language, but it was fun and she smiled a lot
Mistakes I made today:
  • Apologised to reflection of self when I walked into it
  • Almost left my friends' flat without my shoes - I much prefer walking barefoot
  • Read my future flatmate's instructions on how to use the shower after using it - now need to find the absolute correct place for the tap to be in order for it to remain at a constant and bearable temperature
  • Burned a piece of toast
All in all, it's been a good day. I am content.

Chiang Mai pics








Bit late I know, but here you go. My favourites.


Some presents are so hard to guess aren't they? I also liked the leopard print dressed Buddhas.

The blue sign was outside a toilet, which I really really liked. So much of the signage is about genuineness, giving with your heart or being in the present moment. It's a nice reminder.

Finally, I thought I'd show you an example of a disabled ramp into a temple. Made me laugh so much!

Hope everyone has sunshine in their hearts even if their feet are wading in snow or rain. :-)

Simplicity

This is where it's at: Pok Fu Lam Road.

Further out than I'd remembered, so a longer walk into town, but I must explore my area. All the Tai Chi classes I've found so far are either miles away or on days I cannot do, but I'll keep hunting. It seems there is a large area of parkland nearby, so I need to explore this for running routes too.

Today I have managed to concoct breakfast, but need to do some shopping. I've also (finally) figured out how to turn on the washing machine. So simple. All I needed to do was lift the waterproof cover and there it was. Sometimes it's important to stop and think about the obvious to find your answers. It's not usually as complicated as we think.

Friday 26 February 2010

PS Coconut juice

...which I have been craving over the last week or so, is incredibly high in potassium. Higher levels than a banana. Isn't that interesting? Now what is potassium used for? Nerves is it, or anxiety? No wonder I am so chilled out...

Orange is the colour of the day

I've arrived in Hong Kong. I've unpacked the contents of the most enormous suitcase in the world, into the smallest bedroom in the world. I really do rock when it comes to fitting things into small spaces. Need to put up a few photos and it will feel like home. Almost. There is even soya milk in the fridge.

My holiday is over and how wonderful it was. Like a dream. I have loads of Thai baht left, so I have to go back. This is my way of making sure. I had some HK dollars in my purse and it made me come back.

It's funny to be here, funny to be in someone else's home alone, funny to be on the 25th floor. I feel a bit dizzy. Seriously, I do. Could have sworn my building was wobbling before. Hmm. I thought there was no washing machine, but I found it on the balcony. That's funny too. Seriously need to figure out how to use it, if nothing else so I can work out if all my clothes fit into the wardrobe.

Today is a day of adjustment. I am tired. It's been a long day. I woke up at 6.30am, did some Tai Chi, had a shower, managed to fit in my last Thai breakfast of rice soup and a cup of tea, and then went to Bangkok airport, to find myself sitting on a plane in between two snoring men, with a lady in front of me who found it necessary to keep her chair at horizontal the entire flight even while eating. I used it as a meditation in tolerance and patience.

I am now eight hours ahead of the UK, seven hours ahead of those in Europe, 13 hours ahead of Toronto and one hour ahead of Chiang Mai. Same timezone as my eldest nephew. If any of you are elsewhere, you'll have to work out the time difference yourself. With that, I bid you goodnight.

Wednesday 24 February 2010

Vegetarianism and Tai Chi

I love the food here. Kathy asks me what kind of food I would like, which is a difficult question for me to answer. Often in London I might say "Hm, maybe Thai." Here, not a helpful response, so I go by interior design. I say, "Hm, maybe quiet with some greenery around and a shady outdoor area."

However, I am getting tired of picking out caterpillars, ants and flies from my food. Anything soup-like or with cauliflower, generally, contains one of the above. Even the vegetarian meals. Does accidental-insectage and otherwise count as making a meal non-vegetarian? What if you pick out the aforementioned? My tolerance for eating accidental ingredients is much higher than a week ago.

Perhaps it is general bugness that I am getting better with. I was relatively okay sharing my toilet with a huge Mama Spider. Relatively. I maintained a spinal twist while seated on the loo, so my eyes could keep locked with hers, to ensure no rapid movement of those hairy legs.

So I wonder. While Thai food has many vegetarian options, is it truly vegetarian if it contains insects and caterpillars?

There is no link in this post with vegetable eaters and Tai Chi. It's just the other notable issue of the day. I had my first class with a wonderful teacher on Moon Muang Soi 9, on the terrace of a shaded wooden hut with the sunshine slanting through the trees. I loved it.

I will go home this evening and practice what I learned. No doubt badly. But we all have to start somewhere. No-one is perfect. :-)

Tuesday 23 February 2010

Peace and love - the zen is growing!

Not sure where to start.

The trekking has been overtaken by the last few days. In a nutshell, I loved bamboo rafting, but kept my mouth shut once I realised that the huts' outhouses spilled into the beautiful river that was swirling around my legs (and being splashed at me) as I sat on the raft. I loved stroking the elephants and trying to bond with them, but really did not like seeing them being poked with metal spikes behind their ears and having their heads walked on to get to the seat. I managed not to tread on our one's head, but it really upset me. They trekked in the baking sun with no water. I bought bananas for them and we fed them as we walked. Her little trunk curled backwards as she smelled the food and the tips of her nose quivered and wriggled as she got closer and tried to grab the banana. She was so cute!! At the end she drank water and sprayed herself (and us) with water and, I suspect, snot. Other than that, the whole thing felt a little commercialised, although the guide was lovely and picked loads of tamarind for me to nibble on.

The Toy Ride was random. We met at Tesco's (Tesco Lotus out here and green in colour instead of blue). We bought toys and then rode, hundreds of bikers, outside of CM to get to the spot we were meeting at. It was so surreal. Tough burly bikers with stuffed toys strapped to their bikes. Police escorted at front and back and we were allowed to skip all the red lights. So much fun, albeit a little scary for a novice rider such as myself (rest assured, still passenger!!).

After this, Kathy and I headed out to Mae Rim and beyond, to Sirilanna National Park. This is where we met the Yorkshire man who owns the floating cottages we were heading to. Honestly, this is the single most beautiful place I have ever been to. The cottages were in the middle of a large lake, tethered from floating away by anchors. They were separated into three bedrooms in a central row, with a kitchen out front and a toilet out back (complete with Mrs Spider the size of my palm and her baby - both with furry legs and shiny eyes). No electricity, no running water. These structures made a cross shape and in the spaces between the four tips of the cross were platforms to sit, rest, meditate and read, with hammocks, sofas and cushions. All the different structures were held together with wooden walkways that creaked and set each platform gently rocking as you crossed them. Wooden planking or wicker covered the floors. The beds were hard and firm with a mosquito net above all of them. Me and Kathy shared and this felt much less scary when night fell on the first night.

There were two floating gardens full of frogs and other unknown noisy creatures. The lake was surrounded on all sides by jungle which was surprisingly noisy - monkeys, frogs, geckos, birds and crickets. Such a delight to listen to at night! My major discovery is the sound geckos make - I never knew they spoke! A kind of creaking sound and every so often, they shout 'Gecko!'. Oh yes, and a runaway cockerel, which kind of spoiled the jungle effect!

Elementally, it was perfectly balanced. They burn the jungle, as when plants return, mushrooms grow which sell for a lot of money. So we had fire, earth, air and water.

A couple who live on a close by floating cottage with their children work for the Yorkshire man. He catches fish and runs people from the mainland to the cottages; and she cooks three times a day and changes beds. They are an amazing couple. So content and happy and so gentle with each other. They have no idea how wonderful their relationship is - to them it is just normal and they live simple happy lives. Other than a few minutes at meal times, the only other person we spoke to was Alex. Maybe in his 60s or 70s, it was hard to tell, he stays there six months a year and then returns to Switzerland. He travelled the world, six months on horse back through the 'istan' countries and India, ending up in Hong Kong working as a model for two years to make money. He then went home and was a mountain guide for 20 years, finally selling watches to make enough money to retire. Startlingly clear blue eyes, white hair and goatee and leathery brown skin, he is so alive and full of peace and looked remarkably like Mr Tumnus. He kept away on the first night, but was quite talkative the next day, comparatively speaking - recluses are not well known for their chat. He showed us how to paddle board which I absolutely loved. I thought I'd fall off - you stand upright on a board a little like a surf board and paddle, first one side, then the other. It's great for balance and core strength, incredibly meditative and quite exciting. Anyway, it was wonderful to see someone living the life they want to live, with few compromises.

My body is still rocking from the one and a half hour motorbike ride there and back, and from the rocking of the cottages. Maybe I should find a lake and build a floating cottage - or perhaps, get someone else to build one. I wonder what the building regulations would be on that...? Ooh, the first time I have even vaguely thought of work for what seems like a lifetime, although I know it's only been just over a week since I left the UK. Hmm, I wonder if my brother gets his swamp land whether he can build a floating cottage...

Ai. My laptop battery is dying, so I'd better go. I'm sure there's LOADS I have forgotten to say, but this is probably longer than most of you will read anyway!

Keep smiling kids.

Friday 19 February 2010

Catwoman in a cardi


So what have I been up to recently? Haha!

Yesterday we ambled aimlessly. It's nice to amble aimlessly. And good when it is so roasting as it is. It's about 35 Celsius in the day and about 25 at night. Nevertheless last night I slept with leggings, long sleeved top and woolly hat on. At 5am I awoke to my sister's text (she never remembers my timezones) and I was freezing, so I donned a big woolly cardi too. Thank goodness for preparation!

When Kathy went off to work in the evening, I headed to a Chi Kung class and I was the only student. It was wonderful. I have never had a one-to-one session before (or a female teacher). It was intense, but the energy was peaceful, gentle and happy. The session was on the top floor of a wooden hut - open air with a fan blowing gently to cool us a little as we worked.

In the evening we went to a jazz bar and sat on a balcony that would not have passed H&S standards in the UK but which was delightful. Relatively early evening for us, so Kathy took me on some test drives (with me as motorbike passenger) to get me a bit braver. I am such a baby! Honestly, you have entire families on these machines here (I kid you not!) and sometimes a dog, or a piece of recently purchased furniture too. I saw one woman sitting side-saddles, texting, while being a passenger. How do they not fall off?? I don't understand!!

Anyway, this was in preparation for today, when I was so nervous I ate only part of my bacon soya pancake (I know) with maple syrup for breakfast. We headed off to a hill top temple which was such a wonderful ride, but slightly delayed by the arrival of a princess and a slow moving Mazda truck thing. I only gripped hold a few times and tried to turn screams into giggles. It worked well. Turn fear to excitement (with caution) and I think that is the way to go. So this hour long ride (in total) with Kathy was my first lesson in submission. I'm not very good at handing over control and I know I need to learn. In life balance is essential and sometimes submission as as important as control/dominance. Balance.

My second lesson in submission was having a Thai massage. Most of my bones cracked. At one point - goodness only knows how, because I have no idea - I was suddenly lying on my back, with the masseuse underneath me, her legs in lotus position supporting my lower back. I remain so confused as to how she did this. Nothing hurt, but all my bones cracked back into where they were clearly meant to be and my limbs feel longer than they ever have done before.

So I came from the massage (which cost less than £4 for over an hour) to this cafe (and on the way watched an old man use his keys as a cotton bud to clean his ears). They have free wifi here. Hurrah! And they let you charge things, so my mobile and iPod are charged and my laptop is being charged as we speak - I have no socket in my guesthouse. In order to stay here I have ordered two cups of tea, a banana and chocolate muffin and a vegan apple strudel and I am shortly going for dinner with Kathy. Bleugh. I feel sick! Well, I need to make up for my lack of food in Bangkok I guess. :-)

So.The plan for the next few days.

Saturday Kathy works all day so I have booked to do a tour which will involve elephant riding, visiting a hill tribe, bamboo rafting, swimming near a waterfall and a small trek. In the evening we have to go toy shopping because on Sunday....

....we go for a toy ride!! We're meeting early in the morning on our motorbikes (me being passenger, I am not ready to be in control!). We then go to an orphanage to give the kids the toys, play with them a while, get fed dinner and make a donation to the orphanage. I can't wait! I'm really looking forward to this.

Sunday evening we head out of contact to a floating cottage where we will hopefully stay two nights and a couple of days. No electricity, no running water. Nothing. All we will have to do is read, write, swim, meditate, sleep and eat. This sounds like heaven to me. :-)

I have properly got into the holiday mode now and am very happy. Kathy is a great host, taking good care of me, which makes things so easy and I am grateful. I am thinking of everyone back home and it has been good to speak with some people.

As always, keep smiling folks. Life is beautiful. xx

PS See me in my catwoman helmet and really I am so uncool...

Bangkok photos

































I only have two of the old town - the canal and the criss-cross wires shop. It felt kind of disrespectful to take photos in someone's private life-space, although for me it was the most beautiful part of Bangkok. I hope it gives you some idea of what it was like. Beautiful and harsh though - such a tough life for some people. Heartbreaking.

Wednesday 17 February 2010

Bangkok Old Town

What wonder! How did I not find this before? By not turning left, that's how - Zoolander would be proud of me today!!

The green river, piled high on both sides with articles of life and living: mattresses, sofas, chairs - places that people work and eat. I saw a family lying asleep, mother curled around her child, father with his arm draped loosely around his wife. So tender and inclusive. A little circle of love. It touched me so! Another woman lay sleeping alone, so thin it was a wonder she did not break - she certainly broke my heart. So still, she could've been lying in a coffin.

I walked where my feet took me and I came across another beautiful temple, only this one was not so perfectly maintained as the others I have seen. Parts seemed abandoned. It was populated - in its gardens - by stray cats, cautiously approaching, then bolting when they got too close; monks in their orange robes with bright yellow sashes; and old people resting in the shade, some with blisters and sores open, weeping down their legs. The paintwork was patchy, but beautiful nonetheless, and the trees and flowers seemingly watered and nurtured with love (people at work are you nurturing my plants, I wonder!). A man gestured to me. "Come" he said. "Take your time."

Take your time. I love this phrase and it is so common here, especially in the temples. I find it so welcoming and gentle. I would love this to be an ethos more common at home, where time always seems to be of the essence. Of the essence. Now what does this mean? Time is just a construct designed to help us fit into a time-bound world. It is so bizarre. Time should not be something to be lived to: how can it be? How can you make a good decision if you cannot take your time? You need time to gather clues and wait for the answers, as difficult as this might be. Patience brings the truth. Good things come to those who wait. Perhaps there is an ethos of this at home after all, even if only through advertisers...

So I sat, legs crossed, eyes closed for what must have been a while. It was long enough for my right foot to go numb so I could not stand - this usually takes around 45 minutes. I was brought back by the sound of a child crying and I saw a mother had arrived. As soon as she started to pray, the little girl quietened and stared around with her big brown eyes, still wet from her tears. How quickly sadness or frustration or whatever she felt, can fade.

When I left it seemed I had stepped into another world. I am still slightly anxious about what the next few months might bring to me, but for now, all is okay. Most people are good. They are kind, warm and friendly if they see you - I mean properly see you, as a person, rather than as a source of money. They are kind. They look and they smile.

Keep smiling folks!! I am.

Talking chihuahuas and other things

My tip for the day came through as At the end of the day, spend a few minutes looking back at your day and simply write 'OK'. If you weren't OK, then just put a line through 'OK'. Don't go into detail - keep it simple. Put your mind to rest and get a good night's sleep. I realised my day was more than okay, despite the initial anxieties.

Lesson One: talking chihuahuas versus BBC World News
Last night I learned a good lesson. While trying to stay awake long enough to allow me to adjust to this timezone I realised that watching a film with talking chihuahuas in it is not good for jetlag and its slightly hallucinatory side effects. I decided after about 45 mins (and I still can't understand how I managed to watch it this long) to watch the BBC World News. Aaah. :-) I have finally found a motivation to watch the news! BBC is such a source of stability in my life, that I found it very stabilising for jetlag too. Although I did watch the same news about 15 times. I LOVE the BBC news. Now how many of you ever thought you'd hear me say this??

I know all about what's going on in Pakistan and with Barclays and with a book about North Korea called There's Nothing to Envy. Sounds very interesting and I learned more about the world. :-)

Lesson Two: eat food
Food is very important to aid jetlag even if one is not hungry. I wasn't hungry for the whole of yesterday and while this morning's fare of spicy rice or full English that in no way resembled anything you'd get in a greasy spoon did not appeal, I ate and I feel better. I also had two cups of very odd tea, but I think they did the job.

Lesson Three: eggs
Itinerary and (very odd) scrambled eggs do not mix. As an aside, how can scrambled eggs taste odd? Such a basic recipe you'd have thought they would taste good anywhere, but no. I now fully appreciate (with fervour) Siy's scrambled eggs.

Lesson Four: cereal bars and not forgetting one's guide
Cereal bars are a Godsend when one is too scared to buy street food (having foolishly left one's Thailand guide at home).

Lesson Five: do not drink where pigeons have supped
So this morning I went for a swim and while I luxuriated in the cool water with the sticky air to wrap me in its arms when I emerged, I noticed a little pigeon supping from the pool. Do not drink water which pigeons drink from. I shudder with the thought of even a drop passing my lips.

So that's it for now. As I have only a few hours left in Bangkok, I am going to go and try to find a river. Failing that, perhaps somewhere peaceful to meditate. Surely there is a temple nearby or a park...?

Chiang Mai tonight. :-)

Tuesday 16 February 2010

Bangkok

So. The plane from Mumbai to Bangkok was full of mosquitoes and I was second to last on because our plane from London to Mumbai was late - it turns out that they only have one queue for women (and five for men) at Mumbai. I got lots of cross looks, but I tried telling people umpteen times that my flight was boarding and I really ought to hurry up. I figured that if they were relaxed about it, I ought to be too.

It's been a long, hot, tiring day. After a lot of prevarication and random aimless wandering, I started chatting to a friendly and safe looking security man in a temple. He convinced me to let him find me a tuktuk man to drive me around for the day after I realised that walking really was not going to be an option! For only 10 baht too. Anyway, it turns out that because it's New Year the government subsidise all tuktuks so they're very cheap today. It also turns out that the tuktuk men make massive amounts of money if you go shopping and (ideally) buy stuff. My man was lovely to start, but after the fourth shopping venue (where I was clearly going to buy nothing) I said no, and he got really angry with me and started shouting then turfed me out into the middle of nowhere. Not having slept much in a while, that kind of broke the straw, or whatever the phrase is, so I went to ask an old lady where in Bangkok I was and then started crying. The shame! It did mean that a nice lad who spoke English took over and stood with me at a bus stop to make sure I got the right bus home. An angel. I could've got a cab or another tuktuk, but the human kindness offered to me after what felt like deeply unfair anger calmed me and restored my faith in mankind.

He posted me (with instructions to the driver) to the Golden Mount, not a million miles from my hotel and I loved it there. You can climb right to the top and see for miles. The sounds of a trillion little bells, punctuated by the odd rumbling of a gong filled my ears.

To be honest, I think I am done being touristy. The shopping - why do I need jewellery and suits?? So much money spent on what? What for? I have turned into a home creature and love the company of people I care about. Happy doing treks and tours, but it's the human contact that means the most to me. I know it's just the first day, but right now a familiar hug would be worth the universe to me.

Sunday 14 February 2010

The big day

I finally get it. It's only taken me 33 years.

It doesn't matter whether someone loves you or how much or for how long. It matters whether you love them. It matters whether you love that person for who he or she is and whether you show that without expectation of return.

Love is to be given, not to be bartered with.

Saturday 13 February 2010

Commercialised non-genuine declarations of love versus the small things

I don't do Valentine's. I don't like commercialised non-genuine declarations of love. Real love is nothing to do with money or things. It's to do with daily actions and behaviour - buying the cheese or the milk that someone drinks, resting your hand on someone's arm for a second as you pass them by. It's all the little signs and gestures that show that someone cares. It's the little things that can almost go unnoticed if you don't have your eyes open. So often, we're blinded by the mirrors, the smoke, the gold. All these big 'gestures' hide the things that really matter.

I have spent the last few weeks with people I love and who love me. I have enjoyed the easy sparkliness that their presence brings to my life. No difficulties, no fears. They reassure me and make me feel safer. I need to feel safe right now as I embark on something that suddenly feels so big and overwhelming.

No doubt after a good cry on the plane on Monday, I'll sleep a long time, wake feeling disorientated and a bit scared, then the excitement will kick in. When I step off that plane and smell the strange smells, feel the unfamiliar heat of the air and see the colours and the beauty of a new place, the old familiar travel bug will be back to walk by my side and keep me company.

So, my message for this weekend to everyone: keep safe, keep smiling and keep your heart open to beauty and love.

Saturday 6 February 2010

Home is where the heart is

Five-hour delay to get to Berlin. Ice, apparently. Listening to this guy complain vociferously and tell me he was going to sue EasyJet, I felt so happy that for whatever reason I wasn't annoyed. He also complained that the £3 voucher we'd been given wouldn't even buy him a coffee. When I told him (with a big smile on my face) that actually it would buy a coffee and a cake if he went to Starbucks (he wasn't the type to worry about multinationals), and thereby removed one reason for his anger, he looked distinctly unhappy and stopped talking to me. Some people want support for their anger and when it is not forthcoming, they just move you from their field of vision and continue ranting elsewhere. No cheering up some people!

I sat and read and listened to music and watched people go by and I really enjoyed myself. Of course, there were some twinges of worry that I might not actually get on my plane, but I did, in the end, though I spent all my daylight hours of Monday in the airport or on the train. Ah well, c'est la vie.

Berlin was beautiful - like a fairytale land, walking calf-deep in shimmering snow. The ice-flakes were hitting my skin, feeling for all the world like mosquitoes nibbling me with their pointy little teeth. It was beyond the temperature that my body was made for, but I sat snuggled in my arctic coat, drinking many cups of tea and eating much cake. As I said to the guy we found on the living room floor on our last day (in what was no doubt terrible Spanish): la torta es para mi cumpleanos, pero no es posible comer el todo en cuatro dias. He laughed. I'm not sure if he was amused at the thought of me trying to eat the entire home-baked thing, or at my Spanish.

I spent the days chatting to good friends, swimming (odd concept in such heavy snow, but enjoyable), doing yoga, meditating, eating, shopping (I do not like Berlin fashion I have decided) and being cultural at a cool exhibition called Futurity Now. Good fun.

So I arrived home last Thursday. Home. Interesting concept. I don't have one now. Keys posted back through the letterbox when I left for Berlin. I have been in my sister's home and am now in my boyfriend's home, both of which feel like home to me. I am not sure if a lack of my own key is liberating or unsettling...