Tumbling tot

On our way up to his peaceful evening bath and story time before bed, our tot tumbled quite dramatically from the top step down to the bottom last night - smacking his poor little head on the stair gate at the bottom. My heart literally stopped as I saw my precious creature falling away from my grasp, fear in his big brown eyes.

Our evening of him being asleep by 7pm and me on my way to yoga was replaced by an evening in A&E with a little girl who had been vomitting all day (and who the boy unfortunately decided was his new best friend), a teenage lad with a broken nose (whose mother told me that this tumbling down the stairs business will be just the first of many moments where my heart stops beating) and a boy wrapped up in a blanket who looked so awful that we sat nowhere near him.

Thankfully the sunshine of my heart was unharmed and I've been carefully watching out for any behavioural changes all day. I have spotted two - one related to the fall, the other, presumably, not.

(1) He has developed a fashion sense and insisted on wearing a specific t-shirt he has not yet worn; and also refused to wear his normal shoes, instead going for a pair of white and blue Nike trainers that are slightly too large for him. Not related.

(2) He is just as happy and confident to clamber upstairs on his own (while I watch on, pretending to be unconcerned), but he now holds the bannister while going upstairs. Sensible boy. Related and rather clever of him, I thought.

I am tired from an evening where I held tight all the muscles of my body, and now feel as though I too tumbled down. I cannot nap with him while he naps, possibly due to the consumption of dark chocolate nibbling as a treat for my stressful evening, possibly due to the remnants of the adrenaline burst from last night. Instead I shall now enjoy some noodles and veggies while sitting in the sunshine on my own, letting my body relax and trying to let go of what could have been, but thankfully was not. I am relieved.